someone once asked me to tell them about my friend kate and i simply said, “she is a goddess.” i then went on and tried to do her justice and to explain why i said that, but it didn’t really impress. then he met her and agreed. she is a goddess.
she came in from out of town the week of my wedding 4 years ago to help out. i was in that melancholy, stressed-out, “let’s just get this done, okay?” phase and then i showed her my dress. her face lit up and she gushed about how beautiful the dress was and how i was going to look like a princess and that was the last of my melancholy. that’s the shortest/best example of how incredible kate is and how much i value her friendship.
to clarify, we’re not talking beer-advertisement goddess. we’re talking the sort of girl-power “all women are goddesses” kind of thing. kate is incredibly giving and loving and nurturing, but if you cross her you are in for a world of hurt. kate protects as passionately as she cares. she is down to earth and practical. she exudes a sexy self-confidence that only comes when a woman is contented with the shape her body is, societal expectations be damned. she is, above all of her greatness, incredibly modest. i tell her she’s a goddess, that other people think so, that she’s amazing and she brushes it all off. “i’m no different than you,” she says, and i know it’s true, and that makes me feel all goddess-like, which is an incredible feeling, too.
perhaps what elevates kate past “great friend” to goddess is that she has the ability to inspire. while she makes so many daunting things look effortless, it doesn’t look like magic. it just looks do-able. kate can do it, so can you. so what’s stopping you, eh? that thing that’s stressing you? meh. it doesn’t worry kate, so don’t let it get to you, okay?
last april she gave birth to her first son (liam–not named after a character on buffy. it was pure coincidence) and ryan and i went to visit the happy family in august. while i’ve always wanted kids, babies freak me out. i never had any younger brothers and sisters, and never baby-sat a kid younger than 2, really, so all i know about babies is that they’re precious and they seem infinitely breakable and oh crap, what if they start crying and i can’t fix it? i’d just been hoping that when the time came some sort of mom-stinct would kick in and/or the baby would recognize me as mom and that would make it easier. within about 2 hours, kate managed to cure me of that. she laughed away my fears in that easy “of course you feel that way, but it’s really quite silly” way she has. i knew after that weekend that everything was going to be okay, and that i was procrastinating for a stupid reason.
last weekend, she and liam came into town to visit some friends and friday night we ate dinner with the two of them (daddy chris had to save his vacation time for later) and some mutual friends who have two very small children (claire is 2ish and mark is 5months). after dinner we went and hung out at the children’s rec center at west county mall. you wouldn’t think that was a happening place to be on a friday night, but the joint was jumping. ryan and i joked that eating dinner with 3 babies was going to fix my baby-fever, and you might expect that hearty dose of reality would help calm it down, but i knew it wouldn’t.
kate is 6ish months pregnant, and nothing brings home the goddess-image than having a 15 month old on your hip, a baby-swollen belly, and smile on your face. “i’m already on #2, what’s keeping you, slowpoke?” she said before she even opened her mouth.
while we were sitting around the edge of the play area kate sighed and asked if i ever expected our lives to turn out like this. “didn’t you kind of hope they would?” we spend most of the evening like that. idle chit-chat, simply enjoying each other’s company for the first time in almost a year and then randomly saying soul-sharing bits of stuff like we could read each other’s minds.
cuz, you know, she’s a goddess.